Terry Gross interviewed a sleep researcher on Fresh Air who seemed friendly, personable, and kind, yet the interview outraged me. At the outset, Ms. Gross confessed she had not slept well the previous night, and this luminary assured her he could detect the evidence of brain dysfunction via her voice in his headset. She responded with a detectable quaver; laughing nervously, she asked about catching up on sleep during the weekend. Dr. Drowse assured her that this would not work. When she ventured to ask the consequence of insufficient sleep, he had one only:

Premature Death.

From here, things proceeded downhill. In a calm and friendly voice, he assured us:

• If you don’t sleep eight hours every single night, you will not get sufficient sleep that night, and that deficit can never be made up.
• Sleep should occur at the same time every night, seven days a week.
• You may “sleep” after drinking alcohol or taking Ambien, but this is a sedative effect, not real sleep, and does not count. Alcohol consumption must stop at least three hours before sleep time.
• You may think you are unaffected by caffeine, but you are wrong. If you drink caffeine after 2 pm, and later you “sleep”, that is not real sleep, and does not count.
• Light levels are important. At least two hours before sleeping, you should be in low light, and not view any backlit screens (including TV).
• If you wake up during the night, get out of bed and go sit in a dimly lit or unlit room until you feel sleepy again. No reading or screen time allowed.

How could anyone who works multiple jobs, or does shift work, or works in the gig economy, or has to both work and be a caretaker, or cares for both children and elders, ever get enough sleep under these constraints? I felt that with every gentle, deadly word, Dr. Snooze was inserting stress into the lives of so, so many people, people whose lives are already on the verge of spinning out of control, people who are working hard and holding it together only to be rewarded by

Premature Death.

I have less sympathy for the insomnia-afflicted Ms. Gross. I imagine her work could be easily scheduled during the day and doubt she has a second job. Moreover, I strongly suspect she could watch less TV. This is a woman who curtailed the interview of the author of Black Man in a White Coat to squeeze in some celebrity with a season opener. When speaking to an actor, her voice glows with admiration. She is well-versed in the minutiae of every episode, the life story of every cast member, and even the sort of “insider” information found in the National Enquirer. She must be watching shows eighty hours a week, but is it worth it? She could be sleeping.