Flying out of Newark Liberty International Airport, which we have done frequently since we moved to California and left a son in NJ, has led me to feel it should be renamed Ye Olde Newark Field to indicate its sub-modern status. For example, it practically never honors TSA Precheck. Every time, the TSA personnel say, We don’t have TSA Precheck today. Really? What day do you have it? Time to post a permanent sign, TSA Precheck Not Honored Here. Boarding passes for EWR departures should read TSA Precheck, Not! This time, at least I got a card allowing me to keep my shoes on. I still had to dig out the laptop and take off my hoodie.

Despite months on the brain diet, I managed to reach the tedious-sorting-into-bins step of the non-Precheck world with a non-empty water bottle. My older son made that mistake once and had to surrender his. Mine is a Kleen Kanteen with a Lifestraw in it, so I was not about to give it up, and I didn’t feel like returning to the start of the line, so I put my bag on the ground and pretended to fumble with my possessions as I unscrewed the top and dropped the bottle onto the floor. A lot of water came out, but I guess the flustered act worked since they did not frog march me to the TSA interrogation area.

ATC struck again this trip, perhaps due to Midwestern weather, though NJ was balmy and flowering. Every flight between the Bay Area and the environs of NYC was delayed, and our predicted arrival moved from 10:30 pm to 12:15 am west coast time, three hours later for our EDT-adapted bodies. I wondered whether the parking service would charge us for an extra day.

I will never know if they would have done that though, since AS stepped up to address the delay again this trip. No gate games this time; the plan was Extreme Turnaround. It started with an annoying-but-effective Dad Talk from the gate agent, admonishing us to gather our items and go to the bathroom Now as the incoming flight was on final approach. They opened two lanes for boarding pass scanning–not different lanes for different traveling classes, just a second gate agent with a scanning tablet–and once on board, received encouragement over the intercom:

• Orient your overhead bin vertically, like a book, so we can fit more in!
• Move into the seating area to unpack your personal items so the folks behind you can continue to their seats!
• Those seated in the exit rows should read the safety instructions while others are boarding!

The plane was full, and it was definitely the fastest full-plane boarding I have experienced. The moment folks were seated we pushed off, and they stepped up the speed too: we landed at 11:35, so the parking folks did not have a case. Even with checked bags and a 45-minute drive, we were inside our house by 1:00 am. 

I did notice the plane bathrooms were dirtier than usual.

Someday I will have pictures of the opera we saw, but all the ones I took are really blurry. My adventures with my new phone is a possible future topic, though an embarrassing one.