Americans know what is right and true, not just for ourselves, but for everyone, and when it comes to sex education, a lot of us would say that is Abstinence. Abstinence sex-ed informs teens, correctly, that the only way to ensure one will avoid the negative consequences of sex is to abstain.

In Brookline, Massachusetts, where our kids grew up, sex-ed is pretty much the opposite of this. Teens study and label detailed anatomical drawings of each gender’s genitalia, and learn the biological details of intercourse, conception, pregnancy, as well as topics such as homosexuality and transsexuality. They read about, enact, and discuss real-life situations, and condoms are distributed freely, to both boys and girls. There are lots of rules about respectful interaction so all will feel free to speak if they wish, and when the sex-educator is absent, there is no sub.

They also learn about abstinence. Brookline’s approach is conventionally known as Comprehensive sex ed.

In the simplified version of the sex-ed debate, Pro-Abstinence folk say Comprehensive leads to sexual experimentation, but somehow teens with Abstinence training occasionally get pregnant or catch STDs, while some of the Comprehensively-trained manage to graduate HS as virgins.

The loudest voices on Nextdoor in Pleasure Point are shelter-in-place abstainers. They correctly note that the only way to completely avoid Covid-19 is to stay inside all the time, to ban all visitors, and to sanitize every container that is delivered. On those of us unable to quell our normal human drives for sunlight, nature, movement, and social interaction, these beings of superior control rain not only disdain but vitriol.

Just as with teenage sex, the problem is that not everyone is going to make the optimal choice 100% of the time. Since we know some people are going to be breaking the rules, shouldn’t those people have the information they need to avoid the worst outcomes?

Here’s where the metaphor breaks down, because, unlike in sex ed, the facts around virus transmission are not well-understood. Lots of clinicians, politicians, pastors, random PhDs, moms, victims, dictators, clowns, cults, and Personalities have bullhorns on the Internet, while scientists leak meager findings of small studies to the public in real time. But no one knows much of anything yet, including the effective distance for social distancing, whether masks block or transmit the disease, whether/how the virus is aerosolized, the most common transmission method(s), the existence or prevalence of asymptomatic transmission, and the level of immunity afforded to the recovered.

Too bad no reputable health authority in the US is allowed to provide us with best-guess guidelines. I’m certainly not that, but I’m taking my chances with frequent hand-washing, 6′ separation where possible, mask-wearing indoors in public, and no touching people other than my shelter-mates.

It’s the best I can do and I hope it’s enough. I’m constitutionally unable to abstain from walking by the ocean in the sunshine with my well-spaced friends.